She took my heart last Friday night,
Left a note and turned off the porch light.
My dog just sighed and licked his paws,
Then logged out of our shared Netflix cause.

I walked outside to clear my head,
Looked at my truck and softly said:
"At least you're here, you're always true..."
But then it beeped and rolled on through.

My truck left me too — just drove away,
Took the dirt road out at break of day.
Said, “You’ve got issues I can’t debug,”
Now it’s off to Vegas with a Tesla plug.
She left with words, the truck with code —
Now I’m heartbreakin’ by the side of the road.

It used to growl when I sang off key,
Now it’s Bluetooth paired with a guy named Steve.
I got ghosted by four wheels and chrome —
Even Siri don’t call me home.

I tried to sue the dealership for emotional neglect…
They gave me a coupon for windshield wiper fluid.
Real helpful.

(Like your ex’s playlist on shuffle: bittersüß und gemein.)

Yeah, my truck left me too — and took my pride,
Posted a selfie on the passenger side.
Said, “I was built to haul, not to heal,”
Now it's streaming sad songs on four Goodyear wheels.
Love’s gone wireless, loyalty too –
Lord have mercy… my truck left me too.

Next time I’ll date a bicycle… at least it can’t drive off.